Archive for August, 2008

The Footballer

Thursday, August 7th, 2008

A footballer who played for Lyme
Scored a goal for the very first time!
The young man was glad
But his teammates were sad
‘Cause he hadn’t changed sides at half time!

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The Pyromaniac

Wednesday, August 6th, 2008

A young pyromaniac called Lett
Who started a fire for a bet
Then tried to ignite
Everything in in his sight
But found that his matches were wet

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds

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The Nerd

Tuesday, August 5th, 2008

A young IT nerd name of Sam
Came up with a masterful plan
He designed a computer
Which sounded a hooter
When it ran out of disk space or RAM

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds

The Young Man From Stroud

Monday, August 4th, 2008

There once was a young man from Stroud
Who ran down the street in the nude
He just wasn’t bothered
That he wasn’t covered
And I bet you thought this would be crude!!

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds

Smelly

Sunday, August 3rd, 2008

A vicar who should have known better
Wrote his bishop a very rude letter
He told him he stank
Like a skunk he was rank
In fact he was worse than ripe feta

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds

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The Cyclist

Saturday, August 2nd, 2008

A young cycle rider called Trumper
Who was wearing a bright yellow jumper
He was chased by a cop
Who said “Why don’t you stop”
‘Cos my braces are caught on your bumper

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds

Bob Miller

Friday, August 1st, 2008

Here lies the remains of Bob Miller
Who was a community pillar
He married a saint
But it turned she ain’t
She’s really a serial killer

Copyright 2008 © Alan Simonds