Funny Limericks For Everyone

The sun is very much too hot
So I definitely rather would not
go outside to play.
Oh! It’s raining,  you say,
I’ll go out as it’s not too hot.

Nicholas Fong (Aged 12)

My limericks suffer a curse
They’re confined to accentual verse
I have twelve or thirteen
Which are reasonably clean
But the rest are decidedly worse.

Yet another one from David.

http://davesbigfatlimericksite.weebly.com/

A fellow named Homer had woes
Which he’d drown in his liquor at Moe’s
Were his troubles so large
That he couldn’t tell Marge?
He’s a man of a great many d’ohs.

Thanks David. http://davesbigfatlimericksite.weebly.com/

David’s email included “too bad most of the limericks I think of are of the dirty variety and probably not appropriate for this site.”

I think the above limerick proves that they can be clean and funny, but  maybe I should start a new site for limericks of the “Adults Only” variety?  Let me know what you think.

There was a man from Timbuktu
Wondered why the sky was so blue
He went on a quest
And was put under arrest
Now he resides in Kalamazoo

Submitted by Maalav Trivedi

There once was a man who, for years
Would always drink too many beers
They took out his bladder
But it didn’t matter
He learned how to pee out his ears.

Thanks David  Excellent 🙂

Visit his limerick site: http://davesbigfatlimericksite.weebly.com/

I once went to the town of Tokyo,
I thought I saw a man who’s Pinnochio.
We sat down to have tea,
but he soon wobbled to a flee,
and into the mist he was wearing a speedo

Submitted by Akhil Reddy

Not sure I get this one?

A mosquito was heard to complain
“A chemist has poisoned my brain”.
The cause of his sorrow
was paradichloro-
triphenyldichloroethane.

Submitted by Trentan Walker

There once was a weird kinda dude
Whose behaviour was childish and lewd.
He’d sometimes go streaking
When no one was peeking
And often he’d swim in the nude.

Another one from Paul A Freeman

www.paulfreeman.weebly.com

The gateway to Hell opens wide
For sins such as envy and pride.
So when meeting Saint Peter,
God’s merciless greeter,
You may be told, “Access denied!”

Thanks to Paul A Freeman

www.paulfreeman.weebly.com